Just Bad Luck...

"Just bad luck."  Those are the words from my ENT regarding the tumor they found.  Actually, I knew about the tumor. It has been sloooooowly growing for a few years.  I am usually in the "I'd rather not know if there is something wrong" camp.  But, during my post-tornado CT scan they found this crazy thing and told me I needed to get it removed.  So, one Neurology appointment later (nope, nothing in my brain), and one ENT visit later, I have surgery scheduled for July.  Many people are very private...I guess I am not.  I feel like keeping this craptastic stuff to myself robs all of my prayer warrior friends of the chance to pray.  And I need all the prayers I can get. The tumor is a mixed tumor just under my right ear.  They feel pretty confident that it is benign.  So, until they tell me otherwise, I'll go with that.  This will mark the first time I've ever been put under in surgery.  I am terrified.  I am terrified of not waking up, of saying  something completely stupid in my drugged up state, and I am afraid they are wrong and I will receive bad news from pathology.  Those are my innermost fears.
As I was having a rough moment yesterday I kept thinking, I don't understand why we keep getting hit with this dumb stuff.  I have the heart and passion to do some really amazing things for God...if he could just block me from life's tedious junk, I could actually get something done.  But, then I ran across this fantastic scripture from James 1:12:
"Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him."
Those are the words that I am letting sink into my heart right now.  I am letting God wash over my fears, anxiety, and questions with this promise.
So, while I feel very confident in my surgeon's abilities and I am marching ahead through this "bump" in life...I do not believe it is "just bad luck".  It is yet another opportunity to tell God that I love him and I trust him.  Even though it doesn't make sense to me, I will trust him.  Please pray that my faith remains strong and that I can honor God in everything I do and say.
Thanks, friends!!