Bigstuf Blessing!

Can you say BLESSING!!!

This day has held so many surprises!  I don't even know what to say!  I know...me...speechless!  Hard to believe.  The day started with an email from our caseworker sharing a new update about Essie.  She is getting so big.  And she looks like she is so full of energy..."Lord, help me!"  And I'm more than a little concerned about the jeans she's wearing.  Do they teach kids how to throw gang signs on their pants these days?  What in the world is happening there?  

This evening, I got a text from US immigration that our paperwork was received and it is being sent on to the appropriate people.  Yay!!!  We're so close now!

And tonight, I got the biggest surprise yet.  Some of you know, some of you don't.  But at our church, I work with the youth.  Specifically, I work with Freshman girls.  These are some of the most amazing girls in the world.  I can't believe I get the honor of knowing them!  They have the ability to make me feel so young...and so old!  lol

Right now, they (along with several wonderful leaders from our church) are out of State at a huge youth conference.  My phone rang tonight after dinner and I didn't make it in time.  A voicemail popped up and the gentleman said, "Hey...I'm going to call you back in a couple of minutes.  Pick up!  It is important."  So, when he dialed back, I picked it up.  Turns out, it was the creator of the camp/emcee calling.  Long story short, one of the leaders and several of my youth girls had written a letter about my family and our crazy year in response to a prompt from the main leader.  I guess they make calls like this every year.  The difference is that this year, they called us!  My dear friend was on stage and she had shared with him our story of the tornado and adoption...and most importantly of the amazing God that owns our hearts.  

Not only did they call to encourage us, but they took up an offering for our adoption and the people there raised over $2,000 for Esther!!!!!  I know!  Crazy, right?  And to make it even more amazing, they sent us some wonderful gifts from the conference!  Super great timing since we revisited our expenses and realized we were off in our calculations by about 2,000 dollars.  Apparently, even if you have a child fly on your lap...they still get charged almost $1,000 just for the pleasure of being on the plane.  Again, we just trusted God to be faithful with the finances!

The other day, I was brave and I looked back at a couple of older blog posts.  One of them was from right after the tornado.  There were a couple of months that felt like such a struggle!  My faith was rocked and challenged.  I wrote a post about "wrestling".  The scripture was about Jacob wrestling with God and not giving up until God had blessed him.  I felt deep in the middle of a wrestling match then.  All I saw was the pain.  And the weight of my struggle was heavier than I could lift.  I questioned God on everything!  I asked Him WHY He would let a tornado hit our home.  I asked Him why my kids had to be traumatized.  And you can bet your butt I asked Him why He would call us into an adoption and then do everything possible to keep it from happening.  Yes.  I was angry.  And I was honest!  I may have felt a little prideful.  :(  I believed that if God asked something of me and I said, "yes", that it would work out the way I had planned...in my timing!  But, that is not how He works.  I know that now.  He could have allowed a really boring story to be written.  But He didn't.  Because He knew that His ultimate goal was for people to see His love and His faithfulness!  He wanted to strip a family of everything so they had no choice but to cling to Him.  He wanted others to see this brokenness and to get involved in the story so they could see God's love.  He knew that He would bring others into this story of adoption and make them part of something so much bigger than themselves.  He knew that He would show up at a youth conference on June 6, 2012 and receive glory for His faithfulness in front of 1500 people....because of what He had done in our family.

This is why I'll never be able to fully comprehend the awesomeness of God!  I have learned something from Jacob's wrestling match.  When I blogged about it over a year ago, I was in the middle of the wrestling match.  Today, I am enjoying the blessing.  If there is one lesson that I hope to retain from this portion of my life, it is this.

OK, two things! :)

1.  God's glory will sometimes require my discomfort.

2.  God is faithful.  If we are obedient, He will take us on a journey that will leave us amazed and changed!

To close out, I have to say a HUGE thank you to everyone that helped out in some way for our trivia night fundraiser!  We raised over $4,000 and we had a TON of fun doing it!  My heart is still overflowing with gratefulness for the generous and wonderful people God has placed in our lives!  Here is a picture of the FABULOUSLY FULL room!  All of these people (as well as so many others) are part of Essie's story!!

I certainly don't feel worthy of being part of such an awesome story.  But I am forever grateful that God is letting me go on this journey!  :)  

Goodnight, All!!!