The fact that I am about to use a gardening analogy is actually quite hilarious. I am, notably, the world's worst gardener. If brown thumbs exist, I surely have one! Every time my poor mother in law leaves her plants in my care, she has to return and nurse them back to life. Some of her plants have been a true Lazarus story. So, everyone that knows this about me will have to push it to the back of their minds during this blog post. I was falling asleep last night and I was thinking about my kids. I was thinking about the kind of day we had. Most importantly, I was thinking about how I parented them. D-Dog probably watched a little more TV than he should have. But, I scored points for letting him tattoo his own face with markers. Extra points for actually taking him out in public that way....especially since he was also wearing a spiderman costume. I cooked for my kids, read to my kids, carted them around to basketball practice, helped them oh so patiently with homework. But, the memory that stuck out the most for me involved my six-year old. He is VERY emotional. Or, I guess I should say, he is very vocal with his emotions. He is flourishing in school. But, he begs me everyday to let him stay home with me. This morning, he VERY excitedly told me that today is going to be the best day ever. It is the 100th day of school. After today, he gets to spend LOTS of time with me and then he'll be in 1st grade. Guess he caught the hype, but not the memo that there are 80 more days after the 100th day. Ummm, to say he was disappointed would be an understatement.
My kindergartner has a loose tooth. VERY loose. Behind it, the permanent tooth is actually half-way up. But to make me crazy, he keeps asking me to pull it out, and then after biting me, turning his bottom lip into steel, and crying...he changes his mind. This makes me LOCO! Especially since we've done this routine about 10 times. Finally, in my not so proud moment, I yelled at him. And I never yell at him. He is so very tenderhearted. I told him to NEVER ask me to take a tooth out again. YIKES. After my temper tantrum was over, I did apologize. What was behind his behavior? Fear! He was afraid. And how did I handle it? I yelled at him. I held him, talked with him, and read him some stories. By the time he went to sleep, all was ok in his world again. But, I still felt a little sting remembering my insensitivity.
So, in my pre-sleep state, I thought about my job as a mom. I thought about how I pour into my kids each day. I got a different view of them. They were all fragile little seedlings in a potted plant when they were placed into my care. It is the love that I pour into them that helps them grow into the delicate and amazing flowers that they are meant to be. If I don't give them what they need to grow, they will die...emotionally. It happens to so many kids out there. When I yelled at B during the tooth episode, It was like hurricane winds to his tender little plant. I know they will all grow up to be different (flowers). But, the end goal is to raise healthy, beautiful ones...exactly as they were intended to be...matching the picture on the seed packet. :) That is God's design for my parenting. My prayer today is that I will honor the differences in my children. That I will give them what they need to navigate this difficult life. And that ultimately, despite my failures, and regardless of my successes, they will grow to be exactly who they were created to be. And holding to the analogy...some plants are harder to raise than others. :) I just pray that God will give me what I need to raise them well.
No comments:
Post a Comment